Coping When You Feel Like Screaming at the World
This week has been a “screaming at the world” kind of week, and it’s only Wednesday. A lot of weeks have been, lately, but sometimes the pain and fear and sadness about the state of the world morphs into uncontainable anger and frustration that you can’t change everything in an instant. You don’t have control over the mountain of distressing current events, other people’s actions or lack of empathy, and you’re not in a position where you can change things, at least in the big picture.
I could list a hundred reasons why, in this moment, I’m tempted to punch a wall or scream at the top of my lungs until my throat’s raw and my voice hoarse. But there’s more than enough of that to go around, and it would only make me more angry, so here are some little ways you can keep yourself from lashing out at the wrong time, and use that emotion in more productive ways.
1. Actually scream at the world
Now if you’re lucky enough to have a secluded house or large property, use that. Take a giant breath in, and then yell out all the anger like you’re a toddler who dropped their animal crackers. If you find that when you’re finished, you’re still angry, scream again. If, like me, you live in an apartment complex or have neighbors nearby, maybe don’t scream bloody murder from your bedroom. Unless, of course, you tape a sign to the front door as clarification. “Not in danger, just mad at the world” kind of a deal. There’s still a chance they could grow concerned from this, so tread carefully.
Option two: the closest cliffside. This one involves a little more effort, but yelling into the void off the top of a mountain is always worth it. Of course, be mindful of other hikers and explorers and don’t get too spooked if someone shouts back.
Option three: I would say attend a heavy metal concert, but that’s not possible (or smart) right now. So are all other concerts. I guess I’m out of ideas. Maybe this isn’t the best option.
2. Impulse purchases
This coping mechanism isn’t restricted to relieving the anger emotions. On many occasions I have dealt with my stress and sadness by online shopping for candles, bucket hats, eyeshadow palettes, and several other things that definitely were not considered “necessary” purchases. But did they improve my mood? Distract me from the weight of the world for an hour? Convince me that if I bought this one essential item, that all my problems would be solved?
Yes, yes they did. Even if just for an hour. Maybe that’s irresponsible of me to say, but retail therapy is real effective. That little box of candles made me smile the whole day the package arrived, and look at that! Screaming alternative.
However, if, like me, you have a strong distaste for capitalism and/or big corporations, shop small. Even better, shop small, BIPOC-owned business. That way you get a unique product, you’re supporting small businesses, real people, and you have a little justification for spending money you shouldn’t be.
3. Hair
So much can be done here. Funky fresh haircuts, bangs, bleach, hair dye. The possibilities are endless. It’s just hair, it will grow back, and you’re not going many places right now anyway. Recently I’ve seen mullets, shag cuts, and split dyes across social media. I, too, am guilty of bleaching and dyeing my hair during lockdown — coral, pink, and purple.
Or, if you’re feeling bold, shave your head. Or shave patterns into it. I saw a TikTok yesterday of someone with a blue arrow patterning their shaved head, referencing none other than the iconic Nickelodeon show Avatar The Last Airbender. Major props to anyone who has the confidence to rock a shaved head.
If you’re too shy, persuade someone else to let you cut/bleach/dye their hair. Preferably someone you have a sustaining bond with, so if it takes a turn for the worse, they won’t hate you forever. Don’t take my word for it, though.
4. Do it together
Whether it’s one of the things I mentioned above, or something entirely different, find a friend (from a distance, of course). Order food, take a trip to Target, poorly paint memes, spend money, chop up each other’s hair, and hike up the nearest mountain to yell off the top without expecting a reply.
Today, I met my roommate at the local farmer’s market and we perused the bouquets of flowers, clay earrings, and resisted the urge to buy something off every single food truck there. I gotta admit, admiring the bunches of lavender and squealing at the pig that we saw on a leash (named Carlton!!) made me a little less angry at the world.
After all, the only thing worse than being mad at the world is being mad at the world all alone.
